Te Amo, Mi Casa

Being so far from normal
makes me constantly feel alone.

People look at me and say,
“You’re so accomplished”

And I think,
I haven’t touched ten percent of the things that I’m after.

But I nod.
I give thanks.
Because that’s the proper thing to do.

Proper.
To be proper.

I’ve tried for a long time.

I’ve cosplayed it quite well.

It’s gotten me into rooms
I apparently didn’t belong in.

But I knew I belonged.
I’ve always known I belonged.

Just not necessarily
for the reasons the world would say.

I’ve always believed
I am exactly who God says I am.

That’s why I can fly.

And I’ve been flying for a while.

But I think…
I’m ready to soar.

So I can’t come home this time.

I must leave.

And not return anytime soon.

Because home does not know
how to love me properly.

Home doesn’t know
how to cultivate a girl like me.

Home made me feel so alone
I wanted to give up.

Fortunately,
I’d rather die
than betray who I was created to be.

But even more fortunately,
I’d rather soar
than die.

So, home,
you will not bury my dreams
in the graveyard
like you did for so many others.

So I leave you today.

For love is not enough.

Te amo, mi casa, te amo.

Jordan Alexis